Life is too short to live with regrets

In my short lived life of only 16 years, I have grown to believe that I have experienced many tragic and life changing things. There has been many times where I have said to myself things such as, "I wish I hadn't had done that" or, "I wish that never happened." Though I have never really been faced with the actual question about something that I regret or would take back, simply because that just does not happen in life. I have been through so much in my short life that it is really hard to pin point one particular thing. Sitting here writing this, is really giving me the opportunity to think deeply about mistakes I have made, or promises I have broken. There are many thing I wish I could take back or prevented from happening though, most things ave been beyond my control. Something that I could have controlled was whether or not I chose to go home. Today I live with my mother, brother and now step-dad Tom. I have been home for a few years now and just like any family we have our ups and downs. I really miss my old family though. A few years ago, I was about 8 years old and placed into a foster home. This wasn't like any other foster home because they are honestly considered my family. I miss them more than anything and they have influenced me to be a better person and do well in all that I do. I was always given all the things I needed as well as most of the things I wanted! Before then, I have never had an actual family. Even though now I see how much better off I was, and how happy and healthy I was. Being as young as I was, my mother was my world. I missed my mom more than anything! I wish I would have known what I know now, because maybe I would not have made the same decision. Don't get me wrong, I love my mother and my family with all of my heart but I will always have that doubt in my mind. Doubt about myself, my brother and my mother. Would we all be better off? Would my brother have dropped out of high school? Would I struggle with the things that I do? Would I still be in Early College? Would I still leave in such a poor beat down neighborhood? Would my mother be healthier? All these things almost always cloud my mind. Though this is something I'll never know. I am not sure that I regret my decision, I just do not like not knowing. The decision my brother and I made not only affected me, it effected everybody. My brother, my mom and especially my foster family. These people were planning on adopting us and it is said that their family fell apart once we left, due to heartbreak  My foster parents split up, they quit fostering and now the whole family is set up on scheduled visits. I regret making the decision. I regret not knowing.

My favorite Hobby

There are many things I enjoy doing, things you could call hobbies.

It is a pretty funny thing how this blog post came about at this time. 

This is a very appropriate topic for me to write about right now considering that fact that I am currently switching up my hobbies. I recently went through a major lifestyle change, in my opinion, and I am hoping to turn it around and make the best of it. Going through what I have recently gone through, I realized that I have not only been neglecting my health, but neglecting my feelings as well. I have lost many things but I am learning even more. The best part about making mistakes is fixing and learning from them. Anyhow, I'm changing my number one hobby to improving my health. This includes eating healthy, exercising and just improving my overall being physically and mentally. I not only want to get into shape, but I want to be healthy inside my head as well. I want to be happy with myself, and stop letting the little things get to me and depress me. My brother and I are working on this project together and both of us have similar goals. I am really determined to accomplish these goals because it is very important to be a happy and healthy individual.

Musics in my Soul

            My favorite genre of music would probably have to be country. I absolutely love country music. I did not grow up around this type of music because it does not really appeal to the rest of my family. I grew up around various kinds of rap music and even a little rock. I like country music for a few different reasons besides the obvious. I think most country music sends a good message. Country music is usually more from the heart and how the writer is feeling, as opposed to rap music which is mostly about drugs, sex, money, etc. To me it is quite frustrating how someone can put a bunch of random, worthless and pointless words together and call it “music.” Do not get me wrong though; some rap and R&B artists are pretty good. The ones that actually care about their music, anyhow, country still comes first. I feel that I can really relate to a lot of country music because most of the time, it is true. Many country artists speak from their hearts and experiences. I enjoy singing, and writing music as well and country music really inspires me. 

I love many country artists such as, Miranda Lambert, Blake Shelton, Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean, and many others. Though, my all-time favorite country artist would have to be the American Idol winner, Carrie Underwood. Not only do I love Carrie’s music, but I have just grown to love her overall. Carrie’s personality is just utterly adorable and I love her attitude, her message, where she comes from and all. I have looked up to Carrie for a while now and I truly believe she is a great role model. Carrie has all kinds of different songs on all four of her albums. I think Carrie can sing about pretty much anything. She has songs about love, lust, cheating, family, where she’s come from, partying, pretty much everything! I simply admire this woman and think she is just wonderful! Carrie’s music has gotten me through a lot of tough times because I feel like I can relate to her and I just can’t help but look up to her. Carrie Underwood is definitely my favorite country artist!  

Click Here to See a Music Video from Carrie Underwood